Blog
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When You Start to Believe We Are Not Surrounded By Lunatics, Please Refer Back Here
I’ve been doing some political research for a little project that I hope will launch very soon.
But it’s given be the opportuity to read blogs written by supporters of particular candidates. And every once in a while, I run across someone so out of touch with reality, you have to think they could bring down an entire campaign just by being a loud, lunatic supporter. If you were a Brownback campiagn strategist, how do you approach this nut job and say, "Look, we appreciate the support, but Shut the Hell up! You’re killing us!"
Here’s the loony in question. Never have a I seen such a well thought-out and researched blog post that contains such ridiculous conclusions from the data in question.
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News from Prison – no not that prison
I have no interest in adding any comment on the Paris Hilton fiasco. I feel bad for anyone that is that scared and upset.
So instead of talking about a celebrity that wants to avoid her sentence, I want to introduce you to an imate that wants to use his sentence to become a celebrity.
Meet Patrick Knight, a death row inmate in Texas who is quickly giving those who favor capital punishment a poster child to point to. Knight is taking his punishment with such contempt, that his friend has set up a web site asking people to email him jokes. The friend will bring him all the jokes, and then Knight will use his last breath to "leave them laughing" as KLTV puts it.
None of this is illegal. But what a statement about how easy it is to become a celebrity these days, if only for a minute. Had Knight put togther a tearful, remorseful apology to the family, no one would know. But instead he decides that his last act will be one which gets him a little national attention. It’s a final selfish act for someone who has already taken a loved one away from someone else. Some things just amaze me.
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Sonics Fans Regain Hope – Here Comes the Calvary, er….Indians
It’s a story that begs for mixed metaphors, and simply reeks with irony.
The 50+ White Men who owned the Seattle Sonics, millionaires and billionaires from all industries, could not come up with the money to build a new arena for their basketball team. Nor could they convince the government that the taxpayers should foot the bill. An so with no solution in sight, they threw up their hands and dumped the team on some Oklahoma businessmen.
More white men. Even richer and more powerful than the Seattle group. They came up on private jets and dined in 5 star restaurants, convinced they could not fund their own stadium. And so, when their negotiations with the same government representatives yielded the same outcome, they threw their hands in the air and said, "We’re going to have to move."
And just when Sonics fans thought it was hopeless, who comes riding in on White Horses, but the Muckleshoot Indian Tribe. And they said, "You see, well, we got a couple hundred acres of land just sitting around doing nothing, and we have all this cash sitting in the bank, and one day Johnny was driving down the road and said, ‘We should build a basketball arena there.’"
And now the most illogical, unbelievable scenario makes perfect sense. If a stadium works in Renton, why not Kent? Why not have an arena next to a casino? Why not build a rock arena / hoops court that leverages the already existing White River Amphitheatre?
And better yet, why didn’t any of the MBA’s working on this project for the last few years think of it themselves?
Now I’m not totally wild about driving 40 minutes for a basketball game. And you probably completely lose anyone that lives above Edmonds. But given all the scenarios, this seems to make pretty good sense, and beats having to start rooting for Portland.
Who would have thought – the Muckleshoots delivering a solution that neither Seattle or Oklahoma’s business elite could come up with.
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Crystal Air – Great stuff
I think I wrote about this before, but please check out the hilarious CrystalAir.com
In particluar, if you like the Muppets, check this out:
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This Company has a Marketing Budget
Because the blog entries here revolve around marketing, with a little start-up stuff thrown in, I’m pleased to find what could be the stupidest product of all time. But these guys not only have a marketing budget – enough to advertise in Google Mail – but a Google Page Rank of 4, making their dumb product’s web site 100 times more important than this blog.
Here’s the tagline:
"The Safe Banana Guard will fit most bananas & give protection during your journey."
Yes, apparently there is a market for a product that’s specific job is to protect a banana. And, the company is funded.
Not only does this product exist, it comes in 9 colors. Because this is a family blog, you will notice that I am refraining from any jokes that could easily float their way to the surface from viewing the order page. It’s not for a lack of material or imagination, I promise. Just sometimes the fruit is so low hanging, you want to let someone else pick the tree.
I think possibly my favorite part is that they have a section called, "Testimonials." Come on… Seriously? Testimonials? Doesn’t something called ‘SafeBanana" speak for itself at this point? Do you really need to read a quote like, "Dude, this thing like totally protected my banana. I know it’s called SafeBanana, but I didn’t see how it could be possible. Now, I’m a believer."
Anyway, as a public service to all you people who have suffered and survived banana trauma, I bring you SafeBanana. Please use responsibly.
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If You Can’t Build a Marketing campaign Around This…Then You’re Just Not Trying
Minor League Baseball rules. Here’s Phil Wellman, manager of the Mississippi Braves, politely disagreeing with an umpire.
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Only 44,445 to go….
Not that I pay attention to thtis stuff…but I noticed my Alexa ranking today is 1,044,445. I only need to catch 44,445 sites to make the top Million. I don’t know why exactly that seems interesting.